THIS is PSYCHOLOGY - emotional negative patterns and beliefs male/ female

Recently I have found awarness on my personal emotional background and I have been very keen to approach it mentally and to understand the big picture, not primarly on me personally, but the BIG picture - im talking about GLOBAL PATTERNS - understanding the mechanics involved in negative standard emotional patterns, self-worth, male/female co-dependency and self belief.

Understanding the mechanics, recognizing patterns, identifying triggers and overall controlling the process over clarity and understanding.

Surely, this is one of the many missing pieces I look for in my life - trying to complete the puzzle of truth - who am I, how do I work? what are my beliefs? what are my patterns and its functional mechanics? and finally the end question, and the most important one:

who do I want to be ?
what do I choose to take as my core beliefs?

These are two LIFETIME biggies - but the fact one can ask to itself these questions - is a highe achievement in a way, it means already you have broken off someway with negative self and general beliefs that you do not have a choice to who you are and what do you believe in this life - the FATAL TRAP of FATALISM ( and do I know about Fatalism myself ? )

I realize now, that FATALISM although with its high price ( you become a slave of circumstances , a particule of dust forever lost ands floating weightless in life - no weight, no decision, no power, no voice, no responsability - always a victim, never a maker ) - its endlessy more appealing to conform to rather than facing the overwhelming RESPONSABILITY that is the belief that you have a CHOICE to how you CHANGE and DEVELOP as a individual human being, how you MAKE yourself trouth life as a INDIVIDUAL and crucially reflected with this WHAT DO YOU CHOOSE AS TO YOUR BELIEFs.

It takes a lot of guts to CHHOSE to be RESPONSIBLE for yourself, your emotions and your beliefs, to CHOOSE YOUR BELIEFS and even more to keep faithful to this choice steadly as you go trough life.

RESPONSABILITY - to make YOURSELF, to CHOOSE, to face the boundaries of CONTROL (we can not control OTHERS or at some point EVENTS - the ONLY realistic source of CONTROL in life we will ever have is OURSELVES - and that is more than enough in your plate to deal with). And with all this come other type of responsabilities - the fine, dangerous line of our impact in others - AWARNESS of the patterns we slip into and our co-dependency effect on OTHERS.

This is why I personally believe, that there are NO CONFLICT, NO PROBLEMS, NO PAIN between people ( whatever theyre emotional satus: friends, family, partners, lovers, enemies ) that cannot be SOLVED or HEALED. In a way, we have a underlying moral responsability to OTHERS to KNOW OURSELVES and our beliefs first - if we do this, we will always have the HEALING CLARITY within ourselves to avoid NEGATIVE situations, within ourselves and especially those who will affect others.

One of my life beliefs is TRUTH - no matter how hard, or painful - IT WILL AWLAYS PROVIDE HEALING CLARITY to everyone. THE TRUTH cannot ever be a BAD THING - so why do people hide it so much? hide from it so much? you know if you have a wound in your flesh, you will have to disinfect it - that will be painful, but absolutely CRUCIAL for the HEALING PROCESS.

Embrassing TRUTH in my life, probably as my core bone, my ground belief - in all its consequences - gives me in fact a great HOPE, and STRENGHT and MOTIVATION to make my life, to live my life which in the end seems to be mainly about FINDING THE TRUTH ABOUT MYSELF and WHITIHN THE OTHERS around me.

I have a belief also, that the best media to understand people and myself is to study emotional and relantionship patterns - as unvariably - these always reflect the inner core of self belief and self esteem.

What is the TRUTH of our beliefs?
Do we know?
Do I know?

I surely plan to find out over my lifetime - and that I have decided will be my career in this life.